Holy canoli, entries on two consecutive days?!
I bet Jessie's having multiple orgasms. (Ew.)

So I've decided the closeness of the Dollar Tree and Starbucks is the most amazing thing in Pittsburg. Really. Ridiculously expensive amazing coffee right next to ridiculously cheap amazing earrings (and coloring books).

Cinnamon dolces taste like Christmas.

Making French onion soup is reeeally. Because you have to put the soup in the bowl and then cover it with the cheese stuff and THEN PUT IT BACK IN THE OVEN. My mom was scared the bowls would break. Of course, I interpreted break as EXPLODE-AND-KILL-US-ALL. So I decided to take a nap until the soup was ready. It was surprisingly good. (Most of the surprise was due to the fact that it looked like regurgitated vegetables and cheese.)

I watched Elizabeth I, the miniseries with Helen Mirren (who won an Academy Award for The Queen, in which she played Elizabeth II. Yeeeeah.). Weeell, I actually have about thirty minutes left, but I know the story. And I stopped watching because I didn't want to cry.

Guess who's procrastinating their spring break homework until Sunday night/Monday morning?!

...

MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

-sigh-
-pokes LJ-

My LJ is a ZOMBIE. That takes a lot of really loooong naps.

So.
State orchestra was extremely fun. Fifteenth chair? Ahwell.
And well. School is school. It'll always be part-awesome and biggerpart-tedious.

I was in a car wreck twoweeks-ish ago. Nobody was seriously hurt or anything. And I think nobody even got a ticket. But wow. They are fast and scary and I really understand the purpose of seat belts now. Because it was a JOLT and god. If I hadn't have been wearing it, then.. yeah. Probably through the windshield, maybe? I don't know. Scary.

Also, apparently insane rainstorms make the basement leak. Yaaaaay. It's great that my room is down there.

On the other hand, Spring Break? Much needed. Much fantabulous. Much of laying around and doing nothing. I love having time to procrastinate everything.

AHAHA, I got an A on that Shakespeare project. Which is just lovely, considering that Owsley said that you couldn't get a good grade if you did the project in a week. And I started mine, ohh.. the day before, pretty much.

Soo I get to take all my finals this semester, which should be pretty darn exciting! Especially in Sophomore Focus (i.e., class where you watch videos about "interesting" careers like LEGO SCULPTURE DESIGNER! and TOUR GUIDE! and OTHER THINGS I DON'T CARE ABOUT!).

I don't even want to think about the Shakespeare final. I have a feeling that some very serious brain 'splosions will occur. Also, Sparknotes's No Fear Shakespeare section will become my new home. Yaaaaay.

Off to right an essay about things I learned about myself by keeping a journal for the semester. Ohdear.

Yeah, let's schedule a lesson on the day that I should really be working on that ten-page research paper.
Let's write an LJ entry about it too!

I fail at life.

So district orchestra's cancelled, obviously.

Mom: "There's still state!"
Me: "HAHAHA. -brainsplosion-"

State sounds scary.

-pokes LJ-
Maybe I'll start updating you again.

It's amazing what I do when trying to put off a 40-hour research project that's worth 40% of my grade in Shakspeare. Due on Monday.

Ahh, procrastination goes so well with snow days.

Also, why did I put so much purple on this thing? Deargod.

Everything's friends-locked now. Tada!

Ooooooooooooookay. So basically, I'm the worst person in the world and I'm going to Livejournal-Hell because I haven't updated in.. months.

There are strange noises coming from the closet. I hope it's my cat.

Jessie's a hep cat. ^_^

OKAY! Anyway, so. Uhm.

Well, this is awkward.

I used to want to be a writer, but I think it's gone away for a while. Music is just ten billion times more important right now. Or sixty billion. Or some other number that's so big that it means nothing.

So I have another crush on a different boy. But I reaaaaaaaally think he might be gay. He told me he didn't find breasts attractive. Seriously. Gay.

I'm going to orchestra camp this summer. String Fling, tehe. I tried to get a scholarship for it, but I didn't. That's okay. It's really not that much money, but it would've been nice to get in for free. I sent in the application a day before the deadline, so that might've had something to do with it. (Whooooops.)

I got a new dresser today. It's pretty ugly. In the non-oxymoron sort of way. But I'll paint it and cover it with stickers and stuff.

I had a dream that I had a fake tattoo about as big as my hand. And I couldn't really tell what shape it was, but after I lifted it off of the paper stuff, I stretched it really tall. And then. It was. An ostrich. And so I put it on. I had an ostrich tattoo from my toes to the space in between my breasts. It was quite lovely. But then I woke up.

That dream was two nights ago.

Maybe I'll update later. Probably the next time Jessie tells me to.

I am officially the most horrible person in the world.

After all my preaching about the evils of MySpace..

Yeah, I got one.

I blame Caroline entirely.

And since my username on it is the same as on here, I'm friends-locking all of the juicy stuff. And Jessie-locking the juiciest.

In other news, my favorite person that actually ATTENDS the same school as me is moving. In two weeks. To Lawrence.

My mom offered to let her finish out the school year here and live at my house for a month, but I don't think that's gonna happen.

So, yeah. That sucks a lot.

Oh, this month:

8th - Perform solo

11th - Math relays. Someone signed me up for Algebraic Word Problems. -mutter- But I get to do a team event with Nina. And Vinnie will be there. And I get a bunch of time out of school to wander around the PSU campus with possible Asian hawtness. (I'm referring to Nina, Trisha, AND Vinnie there.)

19th - Go to a lake to find LIFE. We swabbed a bunch of places around the school and let the bacteria grow in a Petri dish last week. It was.. interesting. And we got to stain them. And I got to work with FIRE. Yeah, alcohol burners are fuuuuun. Anyway, Nina and I tested the knob of the only usable water fountain in the gym, the door handle on the preferred stall in the preferred women's restroom, and the lock handle on Tatum's locker. And his was the most gross BY FAR. Just. Ugh. It had this weird RED bacteria. And then the gross green and white one whose growth looked like a mutant zit. Ugh.

20th - Foreign Lanuage Field Day! Oh, thank you, Madame Colyer, for signing me up for Culture Bowl, especially since I previously knew NOTHING ABOUT FRENCH CULTURE WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU ARGH. But yeah, now I do.

And I got 15th in the state for the French I National Exam thing. Which is.. okay, I guess. Yeah. I'll pwn everyone next year though. Moohahahaha.

Anyway, gotta go finish that whole MySpace thing. And then jump off a cliff.

PS: Jessie, are you alive?

Okay, that subject is what today was SUPPOSED to be. Because I woke up this morning and honestly believed it was going to be a great day (for some strange reason). Well, orchestra and a class with Sticky and seminar and first lunch. And of course, the last school day before spring break. But almost everything I was looking forward to totally backfired. Yet other things happened randomly that were awesomelyawesomeawesome.

Pro:

1. I actually had the will to wake myself up early enough to finish my homework. Well, the part I didn't forget about, but THAT DOESN'T COUNT BECAUSE THIS IS A PRO LIST, GODDAMMIT. Ahem.
2. I had breakfast, which is.. unnatural. It was also an extremely unhealthy breakfast, which quadruples the awesomosity.
3. I also had the will to force myself to draw my political cartoon in seminar. Which I still think is stupid and unamusing, but ohwell. Doesn't count. Pro list. Goddammit. AGAIN.
4. Orchestra was fuuuuun. The Pizzicato Polka? HAHAHAHA. I'm sorry, but wow. What a fun title. It's a fun song too, even though it screams "I KEEL YOU!" at my right thumb. Also, sightreading songs where violas actually have melody? Weeeeeird.
5. "Yeah, this my bright, happy poster.. about terrorism!" actually made the class laugh. Woo. Yeah, I swear, Hamas in GIANT PINK BUBBLE LETTERS. And of course, the glue turned all the terrorists' beards bright green. -headpalm- And the class thought my cartoon was funny.
6. CHINESE CHICKEN. 'Nough said.
7. Addition: Free Dr. Pepper and Kit-Kat in seminar. For no evident reason.
8. Another addition: Explaining to an unnamed friend what fellatio was. Priceless.

Con:

1. Do I actually have to do this? I'm kindof happy now. ...Okay, fiiiine.
1 1/2. Sticky.. I don't know. He was acting weird in orchestra and I think something bad might've happened to him. Because he had to go the office to take care of something twice. And then he had to call him mom. And later I could tell he was trying to act all happy, but when he thought nobody was looking he was veryvery unhappy. I don't know.
2. Forgot to bring Spaghettio's AGAIN for lunch. Oh, my precious microwave, I will return to you soon.
3. Going outside in second hour to look at TREES? Ohhh yeah. Freezing. And she told us we were going to get to watch Madagascar, which I now have to rent. Because I'm incapable of only watching part of a movie.
4. Jody was being a bitch on the bus. I don't think she really reads this, and if she does, ohwell. Seriously, if that whole thing was because you don't like Maggie still, get over it plzkthxbai? And if it wasn't, then just.. I bring you Yakisoba for lunch one day and let you come over and live at my house for a week and don't even say anything superoffensive whenever you really irritate me (which is beginning to happen more and more) and you won't even get your cell phone out of your fucking purse? Right. I love you, but sometimes I don't understand why you do or don't do stuff.
5. I haven't talked to Jessie in a while. I don't know, it kindof feels like we're growing apart, but I'm pretty sure it's only temporary. Because it's only been happening for a few days, and we can fix it over spring break.
6. Bones was.. predictable, which isn't usually how it is. The OC was.. retarded, which I guess makes sense because it's a teen drama. But I was addicted to it and now it's just, bleh.
7. Bucky didn't get voted off Idol. -seethe-
8. Phoebe had a psychowhiningattack when I got home. Seriously, she needs PILLS.
9. God, my family is annoying me.

Pro/Con:

1. Yeah, I'm pretty sure Sticky knows I like him. I waited for him after orchestra, right outside the door, for about five minutes. And he knows how important lunch is to me. Heh.

Con:

10. Of course, he had to go to the office after that. So I looked right a retard.

Yeah. In conclusion, I am retarded, shouldn't like boys, and need to do something more productive than update my livejournal.

At least Jessie won't yell at me now..

"So how are you today, Jody?"

"MHM. That means good."

"Really, Jody? Are you sure? Because I am detecting a smidgen of discomfort in your tone."

"Well, you ARE sitting on me."

"I have no idea as to what you are referring TO. I also am a rebel and end sentences in prepositions ABOVE."

"Ow."

"I am very concerned, as you appear to be having some sort of psychological pain, possibly caused by the lack of me sitting on you ABOUT."

"That psychological pain is actually the lack of blood running to my right leg."

"You know, if you didn't have your right leg, you could probably get out of gym UNDER. Although that podcast did say that it could take a few days for a body part to die, and I'm not sure if the mass of my ass is enough to stop the blood flow BELOW."

"I am thinking. Hold on.. WHAT?! DON'T WALK AWAY FROM ME!! THE ALMIGHTY WOGGERSOP!"

"I knew I shouldn't have given you that caffiene OVER. Actually, Sprite is supposedly caffiene-free THROUGH. But is it crack free AT? I think not IN."

"Sheebottleshwoooob."

"That's it, back in the cage AMONG."

My head is a mess at the moment, so maybe typing my thoughts will give it some sort of organization.

I wish I was prettier more photogenic. I was trying to take a new picture of myself to replace my retarded one on Xanga, but I ended up taking an even more retarded picture. Which I didn't even think was possible. My camera and my face don't get along very well.

Did you know that spoony's a word and I didn't make it up despite certain people's false accusations? It really is. It means silly. Or sentimentally in love, I think, also. But that doesn't matter.

I refuse to talk to anyone on MSN who says "hey sam what's up" all in the same message without even an attempt at proper punctuation or capitalization. The least they could do is put some sort of separation between the "hey sam" and the "what's up." I mean, really.

I saw a ballet tonight. For some reason, saying that sentence outloud make me giggle insanely. It just seems so weird, especially to my family. A Midsummer Night's Dream. Several pretty people in the production. I told Jessie I was going to marry three of them. (To Jessie: OMIGAWDDON'THURTMEFINEYOUCANHAVEBOTTOMOWWW)

My fingernails have reallyreally chipped pink fingernail polish on top of them and lots of dirtmuckwhatever under them. It's a really weird contrast. The pink was the exact shade as my little sister's nails, which was an odd discovery especially considering we don't live with each other and therefore do not share the same polish. And I really don't know WHY mine were pink in the first place. I think I painted them on a whim because I thought the bottle was pretty. It was in the shape of a BEAR!

So I met this boy. And his name is the same as my stepdad's. And my stepdad's the antichrist. So I decided to call this boy Sticky instead. And I don't know why. So I told this boy that I call him Sticky in my head for aforementioned reasons. So I think this boy thinks I'm kindof weird. Which I am. But I think he's interesting and interested and hm. And he's quite pretty, if I do say so myself. Although he does like peanutbutter. And I don't know if I can make out with anyone who likes peanutbutter. Hm. But he likes jazz. And I really need more friends that can understand why I listen to jazz and blues. Because sometimes Jessie isn't enough. Because of the lack of sexual favors from her. Which really isn't her fault, I guess.

ALL grammatical rules have been abandoned.

LALALALALAAAAAAAA!

P.S. Sincere apologies to anyone who read that entire entry.

I think that Jody is very, very emotionally smelly girl.

Jody would not like to say anything, but she better come up with something soon or I will make it seem like she is spouting enough nonsense to acquire a doctor's diagnosis of Tourette's in 3.2 seconds.

"FWA!"

Oh, thank you, Jody. No, don't speak too much. We don't want to overexert your precious vocal chords.

"WHY?!"

Oh, why?! Such a brilliant statement, inquiring about the mysteries of life and the afterlife. You are truly a very bright girl, Jody. Bright as a mirror that has had the privelege to be shined upon by the GRACE OF GOD!

"You can't put that on there!"

Oh, I think I can, Jody. I really do.

As you can see, I haven't exactly dedicated my life to updating my livejournal. Although that would be extremely depressing if I did.

However, I have dedicated my life (as of last night) to insulting Jessie with haikus!

Examples, you beg? Happy to oblige.


Even if you were
A fermata, a stream of
Urine begging to

Be released, or
A super-fly teddy bear;
I wouldn't hold you.


Mwuahahahaha.

Argh.

Just argh.

I'm really unhappy right now.

I'm unhappy with my friends. I know it's not her fault, but the one person I really want to talk about that situation to now is unaccessible. And I hate it. I wish I still had two of my friends from last year, and I know that's absolutely retarded. Because they're lying, heart-breaking sluts, but I really loved them for other reasons.

I'm unhappy with my unawesomeness. This probably comes from reading excessive amounts of Shoebox Project and Jane Austen and Livejournals of people that are so much more inspiring and inspired and creative and talented.

Speaking of excessive amounts.

I'm unhappy with my WRIST. Because it hurtshurtshurts (yes, hurtsx3) from playing a certain musical instrument too much. Stupid viola. I hate you, Malificent, you misspelled bad fairy, you. And I want to play it at this very moment, but I'm already getting scolded for typing this, even though it doesn't hurt. If I play (and I've already admitted to my family the shooting pains that I feel if I do so), they'll probably take my viola away from me. Not that I've been sitting around staring at it longingly or anything. Ahem.

I'm unhappy with my noncommitedness. (I'm unhappy that it's not a real word.)

I'm unhappy with this entry. I know it's a way of getting things out (there's a word for that), but I just think it's silly of me to put it on the Internet for a.) nobody to read (I could've just written it in my journal) or b.) somebody to read. B's almost worse because it's kindof wasting their time, except for the kindof part. Catharsis was the word by the way. I remembered.

daklsjakasdjklfasjdfkldjfkasd. alskdfj;aeoijx. eijfals.

I hate my local movie theater.

Rent is gone. AND! they're not even bothering to play Brokeback Mountain.

-fume-

In other news, yeah. Um. I made a cake! Kindof. It was with a friend. And we kindof.. boiled it. It was really weird. And then it was horribly horribly burnt, so we tried to fix it with excessive amounts of whipped cream/vanilla extract/cocoa filling and frosting and stuff. And then we had to run it over to my friend's house because the guy at Ron's IGA LIED! and said that almond filling was the same thing as almond paste and it most definitely is NOT! and we were going to take over almonds and puree them somehow with some instrument that is not in my kitchen. And then it started raining! And then we actually got the (kindof)cake inside her house. And then it stopped raining! And then we found a can of almond paste! (Which really is not pasty at all, really. It's more like powder.) But it was like, older than me, so we had to puree it still. And it was damn near impossible to get out the can, so I tried stabbing it repetitively with everything I could find (with short breaks to play old school Bop It!) until I figured out "OMG, duh. -opens other end of can and pushes out-". And then she made a hedgehog out of marzipan and toothpicks! And it was so cute.

-had abandoned entire concept of English grammar-

And um. Yeah. That's pretty much it.

Okay, two weeks. Yeah, nothing's happened.

Today, I wrote a series of love haikus to Nina on the back of a Spaghettios (with Meatballs) label.

Oh, Nina, my love,
Your flowing black hair captures
Both my heart and my

Attention, shown by
My nimble hands caressing
Ev'ry follicle,

Ev'ry strand, searching
For an imperfect (split) end.
Alas, I have failed.


...
Well, SHE liked it. Everyone else I showed it to kindof stared at me, laughed nervously, and backed away.

Ah, it's been a while.

Well, I made the District Orchestra, which is apparently a really big deal because I'm third chair violist as a freshman. Likewhoa, I have talent and skill. Weird.

BUT! (there always is one) that probably means I have absolutely no chance of finishing my NaNoWriMo novel, which sucks aaaaaaamaaaaaaziiiiiiingly with extended vowels. And I have the highschool musical (Yay, Cinderella!) next Thursday too. So now orchestra and sentence fragments are taking over my life. Grand.

Tehe, my friend bought this book of "risque" jokes from the 50's at the library of our university for 50 cents.

1: Where did the chicken come from?
2: The egg.
1: Where did the egg come from?
2: The chicken.
1: I know that, but which came first?
2: ...The rooster!

-dies laughing-

Is it sad that for my best friend's 15th birthday party, all we did was play The Sims 2 on Playstation for 25 hours? My mom said it was pathetic, and she's normally right about things. -sigh- We created hot guys with emoboy hair and got them to make out. In Shanead's words, it was "better than porn."

Lookit! I made a new word!

Anyway. So I'm at home instead of school. I woke up needing a shower and having 10 minutes until I had to leave and I'm sortof sick and I have Global Studies today. I think three reasons are enough.

Yeah, so parent-teacher conferences were a little odd. My health teacher told me I should be a gynecologist. No joke. Seriously, where does he get that? "Well, you've been doing fairly well in a class over the basic study of the human body, so why not be a vagina doctor?!"

My mom finally agrees with me about my Global Studies teacher being absolutely retarded. Okay, so on my grade sheet, it says I have a 107% in the class and I've done absolutely NO extra credit. Whenever we go talk to her, she gives us a printout of all the assignments, which states that I've FAILED a test that I've actually aced and counts the last test we took as extra credit. What. The. Fuck? Then she starts talking about how she couldn't get her computer to print out the grades or something, which has no relation at all to what the real problem is: her incompetence at typing two-digit numbers into a computer. My mom works at a school also, so she knows a bit about Powerschool. She tells aforementioned idiot that you can access the grades from any computer in the school and therefore print them off of any computer in the school. And Idiot didn't believe her!

-gahdoubleyewteeeff-

-deep breath- One more quarter and then it's over.

My mom knows my ex's mom from highschool, so they talked. It was rather bizarre, but nothing compared to the gynecology incident.

And I got to show my mom my current crush, teehee. The only people that know I like him are my three best friends, my mom, and my old gifted teacher. Which is a little odd. He appreciates POE! ^_^ And plays drums and is left-handed and has omigawdohsopretty eyes. And he's only spoken a few words to me. Not that I've counted or anything because that would be pathetic and a tad obsessive and silly of me, of course. (TEN!)